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You spoke of a family; where we were like brothers. You spoke of a time that all would be well! You said I could always count on you, but the only thing I could count on was your constant disappointment. This life is not about some checklist, regardless, ”all your lines turned to circles in time”. With self-righteous indignation, your lies came crashing down like a ton of bricks. Your perfection is an addiction, and it has consumed you for far too long. So now you miss the beauty and simplicity of what was your greatest gift. Did you taste the glory when you stabbed me in the back? When you called them to tell them your story, was your compromise worth your satisfaction? You’ve made your spectacles from the timbers and you can’t see the light. So your anger burns, the embers cast a shadow on your path home. You were a bastard just like the rest of us until we both found a Father. Condescension became your anthem and double standards your banner! Someone else was always to blame for your self-induced hardships. Now I am glad that you’ve gone because I got tired of your hopeless laments. You were so consumed with complaints it’s hard to believe that you were ever happy. Instead you planted a garden sowing nothing but discord and discontent. And now I’m so thankful that there’s three thousand miles of fence to keep your poison from infecting me the way it once did.
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I thought you’d never turn your back! For years we spoke about our problems. When everything came to light, you all rallied to listen to what you wanted to hear. You promised to be non-judgmental. Instead you built your soapboxes and you dusted off your gavels! Your parlance was meaningless jargon, but your lips just covered the deceit in your hearts: I guess you played your part! When she wanted to play the victim, after years of knowing the truth, you couldn’t wait to pick sides in your pious wake. After all these years I thought we were close. You proved me wrong in a second; and things will never be the same again. Your two-faced script became transparent. I’m not falling for your lies, anymore! I don’t care what you have to say! What gives you the right to judge me? What kind of God do you serve that preaches tyranny? You declared there was indecency; in the end it was your lack of consistency!
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Year after year the sun rose and set with hostility and bitterness. So am I that foolish to think the future will get any better? I remember that you once knew how to smile, but now your lips are razors and your mouth is full of spears. You cavil over the smallest things just to try and prove you’re in control. With everything focused on your status and security, you’ve become so concerned with the future so now you’ve let the present slip right through your fingers. Your harsh words and cold skin are a plague! Yet somehow you convince these people to swarm with your pathetic victimized stories, even though we both know the truth! Your miserable excuse for self-righteous vengeance makes me sick. You try to use your God to justify your malicious acts of greed. You’ve been so consumed with gain that even your heart has turned to gold… You live as if bitter is the new black and so you’re going to die cold and alone! In the end, do you think you can find a coffin big enough to take your plunder with you? Your harsh words and cold skin are a plague. You use your God to justify your acts of greed. Do you think you can find a coffin big enough?
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5. |
Act II - v. The Ballast
07:24
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Take a breath, and breathe! Open up your ears it’s time to hear. After all these years we’ve carried one another. And for years we’ve caught each other, from falling down. You never once turned your back, and now I need you again. This time I need you the most: forsaken by the ones I thought close. I never said that I was perfect, and you never expected me to be! The gavels are crashing so loud in their pious boast, all in the name of “their” Father, Son and Holy Ghost! You held out your scales next to the soapboxes to test the weight! I am so thankful that you have a mind that works! So when she tried to play the victim, you saw through her lies. After all the years I thought we were close you’re still right by my side. I can’t thank you enough for the walls you’ve built, for these foundations that have cured. We’re all strengthened by the bonds that endure.
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6. |
Act II - vi. The Beauty
09:20
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I can still remember the first time we met: somewhere between the middle of nowhere and not much else; and how your smile cut through the humidity to find me. Your beauty was an oasis in the summer heat. It was June and your eyes were like the stars. Bright. Full of hopes and dreams. You were a breath of fresh air.
Your voice was a song with the most captivating melody. I was helpless in your presence, but so full of hope. Joy was returning to me like a prodigal, with my welcoming arms thrown wide. We could laugh and carry on so the hours seemed to pass like minutes. How refreshing it was to be in the company of someone so pleasant.
Who could have ever known something so perfect could be waiting to happen? - Who could have ever known that someone so perfect was there? I fell for you like a dream, and now, romance is our pulse, even in the mundane routines of the day-to-day. You taught me how to live. You’ve become the air I breathe! And now I know what it is to feel every breath like a sunset!
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When I dream of the future; I dream of happiness. For better or worse: I thought it was you, because the story of a rescue couldn’t have been any better. Is there no more romance in this empty world? Were our youthful hearts - that naïve and optimistic to be filled with such nonsense? A waterfall isn’t fate!
When your actions become so loud I can’t even hear what you’re saying; your voice has just become a ringing in my ears! With all the Christian language you use, your words crash like cymbals in an empty room. You have been so busy trying to look to the heavens while you’ve been dragging me through the mud. The stories of our history don’t help when our hearts are hardening with every beat. I hope we can just team through, but maybe I’m wrong? Maybe this union was just a mistake? Oh the folly of youth!
Still, when I dream of the future; I dream of happiness. For richer or for poorer: I thought I was enough. But I found out that there never was enough! I can still remember when we met, you weren’t jaded with security; you had different priorities. I thought you were someone else, but you became The Arriviste!
Because when I dream of the future I dream of happiness. To have and hold! I feel like I am alone! It’s only been a year since our first dance and there is no more romance.
You promised to be a lover, but your broken promises fuel the fire of our discontent. I thought that you’d catch me when I fall, and I could find comfort in your arms. But I only found hostility, increasing by the day. No one is an island. Now my Beacon and my Ballast have become your enemies.
When I dream of the future; I dream of happiness. ‘Til death do us part! I want to grow old with you, but you’re just growing cold. So I make a wish every time an eyelash falls: a prayer, for better hearts, and better times.
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First you were full of joy, but now bitterness is the air you breathe: it’s suffocating my heart! You no longer create; you only corrupt! So we wither like flowers scorched by the summer heat. For years you tried to shatter my optimism and make me a cynic like you! Now you’re The Arriviste you’re more distant than ever! Your skin has become as cold as your heart! All we have to show are the scars of our frustrations so we don’t want to expose ourselves anymore! We are falling so far apart, I can’t remember why we became one. The misery we cause each other has become an unbearable weight.
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Your bones have been my bed-frame and your flesh has been my pillow, but now I have to wake from this nightmare. It’s time to put an end to this mess we’re in. I have to cut it off, and throw it into the fire! Your mouth has filled with feces and you’ve deceived The Beacon to join your plight, you’re calling The Vultures under a banner of white! But you and I both know the truth, your heart is as cold as ice, and you’d step on anyone’s neck just to grasp a little bit more. Your lies are a plague! Your greed is rusting your soul! You’re being destroyed from the inside out! Will you ever have enough? Will you be content? I am so happy this is the end. I don’t love you anymore, and it took me seven years to find out that you never even knew what love is. I know now that we were never meant to be together, and you’ve done nothing but prove me right. You can tell all the calumniating stories about me that you want, but you are the one to blame for this! Your malice and contempt for the world has made you so cold and so bitter, that your heart, if you even have one anymore, is just an empty shell. So this is the end! Did you get what you wanted? Because this is the end! This is the end!
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11. |
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It’s been ten years and three thousand miles since the beginning, now I have The Beauty and The Ballast right by my side! The Arriviste, The Beacon, and The Vultures are shadows and remnants of a former life! This city, and the new beginning has brought nothing but hope! Hope for today, and hope for the future. The optimism is permeating. This must be a dream!
This city and these people are more of a home than I have ever known. The prospects are endless and the future so promising. This time it will be all right. Everything is going to be all right! I guess it is going to be all right.
We all love this City on The James! The life it lives and breathes! Its history is inspiring! New memories are ours for the making, because its future is ours for the taking!
When I dream of the future I dream of happiness! It’s in the here and now, and as I forge ahead I can take comfort knowing my life isn’t a silver spoon-fed lie. I know my dreams for the future are based on the truth. With this city and these people around me as a foundation to this new home, this place is revelation; it’s a breath of fresh air. A breath of hope! This time it will be all right.
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I spent seven years aiming to please you. For seven years I was on my knees for you! In seven years, no matter what I did, there was no appeasing you! And after seven years, I had to get away from you! In the end! In the end did you get what you wanted? Was it everything you hoped for? Because I know you think you’ve won, but how can you sleep at night knowing that I am happier than ever? Is all that money a good companion? Because it could never buy my happiness. You are consumed with greed! There was never enough! Nothing was ever good enough. I was never good enough for you! You focused everything on the future while the present slipped through your fingers (you took everything for granted). You tried to play the victim and you might have convinced The Vultures to come to your rescue but now: “the moths have swarmed outside your door and are waiting to block out your light”. What’s your so-called victory when in the end you’re all alone? And you’ve got no one to share in the joys of your self-proclaimed triumph. Love is not control! I feel sorry for your future. You were supposed to be a lover. Instead you became a warden. And the walls you built became my cell. Were you always this callous? Because now I can’t remember when your heart wasn’t stained black! I wish you never smiled at me, or talked to me. Destruction was your pulse and the abuse spilled from your lips! You cried out like the victim, but your tears meant nothing to me. I know your brand of poison. And now I’ve become immune.
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The Blue Letter Richmond, Virginia
In a time when the hardcore scene has been confined to breakdowns and guitar squeals; and fashion has seemed to become more
important than ideas and music, The Blue Letter challenges stereotypes and genre boundaries with explosive textured soundscapes. Their music is passionate and dynamic, layered with hoarse screamy vocals and soft interludes.
For TOUR sched & CONTACT info, visit our Tumblr.
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